I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Randomize
