My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Blood and glitter go together right?
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
