Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Randomize