i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Randomize
