If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
