i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
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