We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
