Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
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