I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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