i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
