So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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