he wants to bone in the snuggie
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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