The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize
