After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
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"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
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I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.