normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone