Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Randomize