Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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