She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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