This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
