Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
