Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
