He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize