I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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