No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
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