sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
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That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
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Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
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