Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
