when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
