She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
accomplished twins. life is a go
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
this boner is exhausting
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Randomize
