its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
he had hair everywhere except his balls
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
