I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
