Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
