your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
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