I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
is it fun? or sober?
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