just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
We got so high we made milksteak
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
