Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
