Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
