have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Randomize
