just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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