She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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