You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize