Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Randomize
