would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
