Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
