i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
