4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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