i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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