he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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