Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
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