I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
