Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize