Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Randomize
