they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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