i just sent this text using only my big toe
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I forget how to act sober
Randomize