my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize