Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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